The Douglas News…March 12, 2009
”Serving our community when we have Time”
Speech given by our Honorable Mayor to the citizens of Douglas.
We will defend to the death our native soil, aiding each other like good comrades to the utmost of our strength. Even though large tracts of the Village of Douglas and many old and stately homes have fallen or may fall into the grip of the Space Aliens and all the odious apparatus of their rule, we shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in Saugatuck or Fennville, we shall fight on the Kalamazoo River and Lake Michigan, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend the Village of Douglas, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this village or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our second homes beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the Douglas Fleet, would carry on the struggle, until, in God's good time, the Village of Douglas, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the old.
The Douglas Broadcasting Company is reporting from the a subterranean Alien bomb proof shelter deep underground underneath the Old Root Beer Barrel where we have a established a live connection and will continue to bring you live updates, casualty figures, firefighting and defense developments and the like as they become available to us.
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